Downton Abbey series 2 episode 6 review | TQS Magazine

Don’t do it Mary! You would never have married a bore so definitely don’t settle for a bully. You have nothing to lose anyway – the cripple and the fallen woman can roll (insensitive?) into the sunset together.

Except he’s not a cripple is he?

Good show Mr Stevens, anyway, for some gut-wrenchingly stark acting upon hearing of your usurper’s return. Thankfully it seems that your soul-searching won’t need to continue next week. A pity it was your only chance for proper alone time with Mary. Now Lavinia’s bloody well back in her drab dresses and plain manner.

I must admit that I didn’t think Mary would be a strong enough pull to make Carson leave Downton; but then Carson was played a little off-kilter for my liking. Granted he is an immaculate example of a very precise segment of social history, but was anyone else uncomfortable when he mentioned men’s acceptable lack of thought but a women’s need to say no? Carson how rigid of you.

So the big story this week was the return of Patrick … Crawley? Gordon? How convenient the disfigured face, the amnesia and the 6 year cultivation of a Canadian accent. Probably some shrapnel wound knocked this gentleman down and inch or two. And it’s likely that all the hard labour transformed his slight frame into a rugby player’s shoulders.

Sceptical? Moi? You bet I am. Clearly I, like Mary, am rooting for Matthew. But in all seriousness, even if the improbable sequence of events were true, even if he had developed a Canadian accent, HE WOULD STILL HAVE THE SAME VOICE. In true Downton fashion, though, my bile is balanced by pathos for poor Edith, and I’m intrigued to see what she does next.

On the subject of intrigue, what has Mr Bates done?

There are some areas that concern me in this series and which I have ignored thus far – simply for lack of anything to say. Happy day though it was when Miss O’Brien and Thomas were reunited, they have been disappointingly ineffectual ever since. I can’t even tell if they’re plotting. Are they plotting? Are they going to do anything? Likewise, where is Ethel’s story going? She’s an interesting character but she really gave us very little opportunity to like her in her brief stint at Downton. I’m just not sure I care enough.

Oh, and the war’s over. What? I’m part of a desensitised generation. Personal interest ranks above national peril.

Matthew 5.75, World War One 0.25 (the war may be over but the wheelchair hasn’t yet been defeated)

Words by @Claudiarowe